Friday 16 October 2009

I Longed for the Manifestation


As a Medium my calling in life is to bring through Spirit which has passed to the other side and to give comfort to those who have lost loved ones on this earth plain. When my mum died in January 2008 I fully expected her to come through to me shortly afterwards. However, the days, weeks and months went by and…..nothing! I began tormenting myself with such thoughts as ‘a Medium who I can’t even bring her own mother through’! The boot was suddenly on the other foot and I began to realise why people, who have lost loved ones, need the services and comfort given by a Medium.

During her lifetime my mother and I would often say that whichever of us passed over first would manifest herself to the other and, on the assumption it was likely to be my mother passing first, the experience would help me in my mediumship by proving survival after death of the physical body. The lack of contact was therefore even more frustrating.

It was a beautiful sunny day on Thursday 26th June 2008 and exactly 5 months 3 weeks and 2 days since my mum had passed to the world of Spirit. On that day I was feeling particularly low, missing her dreadfully. I felt as if I had been hit by a huge wave. Bereavement turns our world upside down; the pain never really goes away and we just have to learn to live with it. She would often say “you should spend more time with me because you’ll miss me when I’m gone”. Howe true those words were.

I was walking my dog Zimba, a Rhodesian Ridgeback, through a friend’s woodland; it is such a beautiful place with a breathtaking bluebell wood and the River Blackwater passing through it on its way to Southampton Water. It is such a peaceful place and no-one else in sight. I feel so much closer to Spirit when I am there. Zimba was splashing about in the river as I stood in the shallows by the bank and suddenly my thoughts of my mother turned to anger at her lack of response to my continual prayers for her to make contact with me. My anger turned to uncontrollable tears and I just wanted her to appear and console me. In desperation, I looked up to the heavens and screamed as loud as I could, “why don’t you come and see your daughter? Why have you abandoned me? You promised you would come back and see me. Don’t you love me anymore, out of sight out of mind, I suppose”? If anybody had seen my outburst they would have thought I’d gone mad. Thankfully, dogs can’t talk but even Zimba looked at me rather strangely!

I walked back to the car and went home and whilst nothing happened that day I did feel a lot better by just getting my feelings off my chest. I forgot all about moment and didn’t even mention it to my partner, Barry.

Over the previous few weeks we’d been hearing some very strange noises in the house at night. Our house is about 200 years old and whilst you expect to hear a few creaks these noises were more like thuds and bangs as if someone was trying to break in. Interestingly, the noises always occurred at the same time, 3.15am. That night we went to bed quite early; I was feeling quite emotionally drained and Barry had had a busy day. At precisely 3.15am I was suddenly woken by the voice of my mum saying “OHHHH”. Prior to her death she had suffered a severe stroke and “OHHHH” was one of the very few words that she could utter. Barry was fast asleep but the noise came directly from him, from the pit of his stomach. He made the noise again but this time much louder and, as he did so, my mother overshadowed him. It was clearly her voice but coming through Barry. I sat bolt upright and my heart was pounding, and yet Barry was totally oblivious to it all!

As I looked to the left of Barry, my mum was standing by his side fully materialised and alongside her was my cousin Peter, who had died some years earlier. Mum looked radiant and at peace with a serene smile on her face. She just stood there in a wonderful glow looking at me; no words were exchanged but the room filled with an amazing sense of peace. Even being a Medium and used to seeing Spirit I found the experience quite frightening and yet amazing at the same time!

I nudged Barry, which is something I shouldn’t have done but I did instinctively. I wanted him to enjoy the experience but, of course, as soon as I woke him mum and Peter disappeared. However, my mind was suddenly filled with the words, “ask and you shall receive”.

I just wanted the experience to go on and on but my hasty actions curtailed the manifestation. I then questioned my fear and it made me feel somewhat stupid. After all, it was my mother for goodness sake. However, it was worth the wait and she came to me when I was in most need. In my heart I knew she hadn’t forgotten me and she just need time to adjust to her new surroundings. I now know that she will come back on other occasions, again when I need her and when she can help me.

It’s funny, but after that night we never heard the strange noises again. I believe Spirit was building up the energies to make her manifestation possible. They knew in advance and were ready for when I was most in need.

The next day I was jubilant, on cloud nine and couldn’t wait to tell all my friends of my mum’s visit. I was left feeling extremely privileged at my experience. Many people never see or witness such materialisation and I felt truly honoured. I could now talk with such conviction and passion about my own experience and share it with others.

Such experiences are truly wonderful and whilst they don’t make the pain of missing loved ones disappear they do help and, as a Medium, I hope that I can use my experience to help others.

2 comments:

  1. I had a reading from you on Wave 105,and I told you how my Dad has had loads of dream visits etc from my Mum.Since she passed in Nov 2009.When she first passed over,we had loads of physical evidence she was around like things being moved,noises,footsteps walking to and from the kids room.Then my husbands brother who was 43 was suffering from cancer and passed over on March 31st 2010.We went to Wales and my eldest son and his girlfriend were looking after the house and animals.I rang Jamie to see how things were,he then told me that the previous night he had trouble sleeping and was feeling down,he went out of the bedroom to go downstairs for a cup of tea and a fag,when he saw Granny at the bottom of the stairs he said he could see her features and her hair,but it looked like she had a dress of light on and around her head was a halo of light,she was trying to speak he said but all he could hear was a mumbling humming noise but he said the words "are you alright love?" came into his head,he said it all lasted about 30 seconds he looked round towards his bedroom and saw our cat staring at him,then he looked back and she had gone.He felt the same as you a bit frightened but not at the same time,he had his cup of tea and fag,went back to bed and had the best sleep ever!!But since then he has had nothing,as afterwards he admitted to me it had freaked him out.And the last thing Mum would want is to frighten him.I havent seen her either I have had a few dream visits,and the feeling of tranquility is amazing.I have had visits from my dogs as well.I know it takes alot of energy for spirits to manifest in dream visits and especially manifestations.I also know from what you said to me that Mum has tried direct contact but I am forming a barrier from the suppressed grief.But I know my time will come.And after reading this I know that when you spoke to me you were telling me from heartfelt compassion and personal experience.Since we spoke my dad has had loads more visits and physical visits.Here are two for example:He kept hearing a noise like a makeup compact being opened at the dressing table,he had a vison in his mind of Mum at the dressing table doing her makeup and her hair.We spoke and we descided it was Mum letting him know she was in the room,then it stopped.Then that night he saw a shadowy figure walk past the end of the bed,towards the dressing table and the words"This is my bedroom as well you know" came into his head,we had a little giggle when he told me. But the sweetest happened last night.The night before last dad was woken by a disturbing vision of a monk type person who looked like the hunchback of Notredamme(spelt wrong!!LOL),it made him feel quite uneasy so he spoke to spirit and said that he would only like people he knows to visit him and that that visit has upset him and then he asked Mum if she could help as well.Last night he had a dream visit from Mum, he was sat on a bench somewhere and he saw Mum talking to some people,he got up from the bench and walked home he saw Mum saying goodbye to the people she was with and he had the impression that she walking behind him watching over him.He was then at home,and he got into his bed and then Mum walked in the room and got into bed next to him and said"Dont worry Love Im here now" then she put her arm around him,he felt her arm around him and then awoke feeling happy and at peace,and could still feel her arm around him for at least half an hour!!!I could write a book on dads experiences,they dont always include Mum,he has had visits from Mutual friends of theirs from where they worked together,and his parents,my mum was always one for organising get togethers and suprises!!It seems like she is continuing this from the other side Bless her.Sorry to have rambled on but I had to tell you. Thankyou so much for the comfort that you gave me from the short reading but I shall be ringing you soon to book a full reading. Julie xx

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